A Programmer Is Born
IT support in Dallas recently obtained a facelift that came out of the blue, but accidentally.
Kevin Welch wasn’t a programming genius, but he knew his way around the campus’ “elite” circles. He and young campus debutantes were well-known around the university, ready gossip spilling from the lips of any young ladies who made his acquaintance. But Kevin wasn’t doing so well in his coursework. As a matter of fact, if he passed a class with the barest acceptable grade, he viewed this as celebratory. His roommate Connor, on the other hand, could write a multiple-platform cloud-based translation algorithm with his eyes crossed, or even while drunk. Connor was, mainly, why Kevin was able to tread water at Texas Tech.
Girls and Computers
There are two qualities of life any computer programmer knows: you can either be good with girls or you can be good with computers, but you can’t be good with both— that’s probably in the constitution somewhere.
Kevin Welch was brilliant with the ladies. Roguishly handsome? Hardly! But personable, socially adaptable, and easy to get along with? These were the things Kevin had over his entire class! The problem was, perhaps, that his social morays left little time for truly learning the complex technological engineering exigencies; understanding these is required for becoming part of that erstwhile network which facilitates IT support in Dallas. Grace would come from an intelligence agency, though.
The CIA has eyes and ears basically… everywhere. Mike Michaels— definitely not his real name— scouted Kevin’s roommate Connor. He saw Connor absolutely dominating the entire campus with his skill. He also saw Welch make all the ladies on campus laugh with him, and being as awkward as Connor around women, Mike Michaels naturally sympathized with the geeky young man.
That said, let’s not give Kevin too much credit; being a ladies’ man on a tech campus isn’t terribly difficult. Take this how you will, but it turns out there just aren’t quite as many ladies in attendance at a place like Texas Tech as there are young men. It’s not a huge difference— 55% to 45%, usually. But then, a man truly passionate about computers may actually prefer their company to that of women. Any young gentleman like Kevin willing to spend time with tech girls can’t be criticized for enjoying their over-enthusiastic responses! And the men on campus, who couldn’t find their way around a date without a manual, likewise admired young Welch— except for his roommate Connor, that is.
So Mike Michaels, noticing Connor’s technical acumen and hating Kevin’s charisma, had no choice but to give Connor a, shall we say, pharmaceutical advantage. Mike was CIA, after all, and everybody knows the CIA made their bones dosing people with LSD in the 50s and 60s. Drugs have always been their forte.
In 2016, over 60 years removed from the initial marriage LSD and the CIA enjoyed, substances have come far! When Kevin found the note on his dormitory coffee table that said, “Are you ready to become a core component of IT support in Dallas?”, he had no idea nano-machine technology contained in the attached pill would send his brain into realms that would make him the most valuable of developers at CTG Tech. He also had no idea the pill was intended for Connor.